tacit: (Rimmer Quarantine)
tacit ([personal profile] tacit) wrote2009-01-27 05:19 pm

McDonalds milkshake or Mr Whippy?

A phone conversation:

Me: Ok, so I've got a labrador puppy, and he's eaten a bag of flour. His stomach's really distended, does he need to come in?
Vet: ...Is it Dex?
Me: Oh my God.
Vet: *Laughs*
Me: Do no other dogs in this town do this shit?
Vet: Not quite so regularly...
Me: It's all over him, too. And it's turned to glue on his fur.
Vet: *snickers* Is he going for the whole Christmas cake ingredients list?
Me: (Considering question: Butter? check. Flour? check. Dried fruit? check. It's just sugar and booze left.) I'm saving the brandy for myself.
Vet: *derailed by mirth*
Me: So, should I bring him in?
Vet: Depends. Plain or self raising?

Because obviously self raising flour is gassier. I did take him in, and he is going to be fine, just a big belly ache. We had a discussion of diarrhoea that was disturbing, because our consistency reference points all involved foodstuffs I had previously found appetising.

On the up side, I love my vets.

Which is just as well.

[identity profile] tacittype.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Eighteen inches of... blimey. That sounds unpleasant! So far Dex's unauthorised snacks have all been edible (although I am missing two small aluminium reindeer from a christmas decoration...?) and digestion has worked its dubious magic. I can hear his stomach right now, on the other side of the room from me.

But yes, I keep snickering. My dog is that dog. The one that gets greeted with 'what the hell happened to him?!' on a semi-regular basis. The clutzy one who charges along chasing the elegant, gazelle-like dogs with his legs flailing about in three dimesions. He's special. ♥